16. Auburn
Auburn head coach Bruce Pearl is living proof of the theorem that if shameless and relentless for long enough, even the most vainglorious scoundrel can paint himself as respectable. Pearl has been one of college sports’ most notorious con men for decades now — he has been blackballed from the sport twice — and he keeps popping back up, like a penny laced with anthrax. He has one of his best teams ever in this Auburn team, the No. 1 overall seed, albeit one that struggled a bit down the stretch. Pearl is, plainly, a terrible person — there has never been a less surprising MAGA coach, and I can’t think of a more apt metaphor for what it feels like to be an American in 2025 than watching him raise a national championship trophy over his head in San Antonio next month. My stomach is turning just thinking about it.
