Fellaz,
Itz gunna hurt a litta to pozt dis. DOC ended up DRY again lazt nite. I dun got played "AGAIN" by a COUPLA BITCHES!!!
Let me cut do da chase reel kwik. ERRYTHANG started fine. I borrowed my buddeeeez Chevey AVALANCHE for da 45 minit drive. I'm thankan dat I'm "T minus 90 minitz and counting" frum bein a PORN STAR, so to get in the mood, I've got my fayvrit "luv-making" song, "HUNGRY EYES by Eric Carmen" on reepeeet in da CD playa!!
I need sumthang to tie me ova so I pull into WENDEEEEEZ and grab sum of deeez Siracha FRIZE-------------------------DIS WOOD TERN OUT TO BE A HEWJ MIZZTAKE!!!!!!
Well I pull up to dis chicks apartment and knock on da door. She openz da door and she iz juzt wut I need----About TWO HUNDRED AND NINTEY FIVE poundz of energy!!!
HOWEVA--- notizzed a problem rite away. Thare wuz ANUTHA woman sittin on da couch. She dun sez she iz a friend???? Well, I sit down and start talkin to both of them and ALL OF A SUDDEN dem SIRACHA FRIZE started playing dadgum dodgeball wit eeeech utha in my azzhole. I meen when I say---BRUTHA HAD TO SHIT-----------------------I MEEN "BRUTHA HAD TO DADGUM SHIT!!!!!"
Well, itz a wun bedroom pad, so DA SHITTA iz rite nekkst to da litta kitchen. To make a long story short, Afta about 20 minitz in DA SHITTA, I wuz needin to kall ERRY SERVE PRO FRUM MUZZEL SHOALS TO SAN DEZZZZTIN to KLEEEN OUT DAT APARTMENT KOMPLEX!!!!
I meen, dem SERACHA FRIZE DON'T PLAY!!!!!
Da only saving grace wuz dat deez two bitches wuz blazztin NEWPORT MENTHOL CIGGZ like they wuz dadgum gummy bares so dat smoke helped a litta in drownin out da BOMB I DUN LAYED IN DA SHITTA!!!!
When I left DA SHITTA I notissed a piktchure of deez two chikkz on a nite table and thay wuz KISSING in da piktchure. I IMMEDIATELY knew sumthang wuz up.
Well, I koodn't sit down beeekuzzzz my azzhole felt like a cornfield in Vietnam. So deez girlz azk me for a FAVOR. Thay dun told me dat thay needed to get a car in FORT PAYNE an wood I take them?????????? FORT PAYNE IZ LIKE 2 HOURZ AWAY!!!!! Little did thay know dat I had 4 RUBBAZ in my pockit and I had dun planned on alreddy bein dun wit wun of dem by da time I wuz thare an hour!!!! Well, I told dem dat I kood not take them to FORT PAYNE!!! Thay immeeediately got pizzed az hayul. Keep in mind, I had only been thare for 30 minitz, and 22 of doze minitz wuz spent on THARE SHITTTA!!!!
I haven't even mentchuned wun of da werzt partz of da nite. While I wuz on DA SHITTA, I gotta text saying that I HAD BEEN CUT FRUM THE GADZZDEN BREAK DANTZIN TEEM!!!!
Talk about hittin me ware it hertz!!! I had alreddy told my cuzzins in Athens to plan on bein at da VON BRAUN CENTER in Huntsville for my opening show the first weekend in March!!!
So bazikkally, deez two chicks set up a plan on KREGGGZ LIZZT to try an lure a guy to take them to FORT PAYNE!!! I juzt happened to be da dumbazz dat took the bate.
I left afta thay kept begging me and then got varry angry wit my azz when it wuz kleer dat I wood not take them.
I did lern wun lezzun--------LAY OFF DA DADGUM SIRACHA FRIZE!!!!!
DOC ain't dun. The SERCH kuntinyouz!!!!!
Itz gunna hurt a litta to pozt dis. DOC ended up DRY again lazt nite. I dun got played "AGAIN" by a COUPLA BITCHES!!!
Let me cut do da chase reel kwik. ERRYTHANG started fine. I borrowed my buddeeeez Chevey AVALANCHE for da 45 minit drive. I'm thankan dat I'm "T minus 90 minitz and counting" frum bein a PORN STAR, so to get in the mood, I've got my fayvrit "luv-making" song, "HUNGRY EYES by Eric Carmen" on reepeeet in da CD playa!!
I need sumthang to tie me ova so I pull into WENDEEEEEZ and grab sum of deeez Siracha FRIZE-------------------------DIS WOOD TERN OUT TO BE A HEWJ MIZZTAKE!!!!!!
Well I pull up to dis chicks apartment and knock on da door. She openz da door and she iz juzt wut I need----About TWO HUNDRED AND NINTEY FIVE poundz of energy!!!
HOWEVA--- notizzed a problem rite away. Thare wuz ANUTHA woman sittin on da couch. She dun sez she iz a friend???? Well, I sit down and start talkin to both of them and ALL OF A SUDDEN dem SIRACHA FRIZE started playing dadgum dodgeball wit eeeech utha in my azzhole. I meen when I say---BRUTHA HAD TO SHIT-----------------------I MEEN "BRUTHA HAD TO DADGUM SHIT!!!!!"
Well, itz a wun bedroom pad, so DA SHITTA iz rite nekkst to da litta kitchen. To make a long story short, Afta about 20 minitz in DA SHITTA, I wuz needin to kall ERRY SERVE PRO FRUM MUZZEL SHOALS TO SAN DEZZZZTIN to KLEEEN OUT DAT APARTMENT KOMPLEX!!!!
I meen, dem SERACHA FRIZE DON'T PLAY!!!!!
Da only saving grace wuz dat deez two bitches wuz blazztin NEWPORT MENTHOL CIGGZ like they wuz dadgum gummy bares so dat smoke helped a litta in drownin out da BOMB I DUN LAYED IN DA SHITTA!!!!
When I left DA SHITTA I notissed a piktchure of deez two chikkz on a nite table and thay wuz KISSING in da piktchure. I IMMEDIATELY knew sumthang wuz up.
Well, I koodn't sit down beeekuzzzz my azzhole felt like a cornfield in Vietnam. So deez girlz azk me for a FAVOR. Thay dun told me dat thay needed to get a car in FORT PAYNE an wood I take them?????????? FORT PAYNE IZ LIKE 2 HOURZ AWAY!!!!! Little did thay know dat I had 4 RUBBAZ in my pockit and I had dun planned on alreddy bein dun wit wun of dem by da time I wuz thare an hour!!!! Well, I told dem dat I kood not take them to FORT PAYNE!!! Thay immeeediately got pizzed az hayul. Keep in mind, I had only been thare for 30 minitz, and 22 of doze minitz wuz spent on THARE SHITTTA!!!!
I haven't even mentchuned wun of da werzt partz of da nite. While I wuz on DA SHITTA, I gotta text saying that I HAD BEEN CUT FRUM THE GADZZDEN BREAK DANTZIN TEEM!!!!
Talk about hittin me ware it hertz!!! I had alreddy told my cuzzins in Athens to plan on bein at da VON BRAUN CENTER in Huntsville for my opening show the first weekend in March!!!
So bazikkally, deez two chicks set up a plan on KREGGGZ LIZZT to try an lure a guy to take them to FORT PAYNE!!! I juzt happened to be da dumbazz dat took the bate.
I left afta thay kept begging me and then got varry angry wit my azz when it wuz kleer dat I wood not take them.
I did lern wun lezzun--------LAY OFF DA DADGUM SIRACHA FRIZE!!!!!
DOC ain't dun. The SERCH kuntinyouz!!!!!
